Forgive- #writebravely #celebratewritetribe

I have always found it easier to forgive others than hold on to a grudge. Being a Buddhist I am taught that forgiveness and compassion is a virtue that all of us should inculcate. Therefore, I have easily forgiven many those who wronged me and included them back in my life, however, over the years I realized that ‘forgiveness‘ is turning into an Achilles Heel for me. Many consider this virtue as my weakness and start manipulating my emotions.

There was a time when a simple word ‘sorry’ was enough to melt my heart. However, there are many who say sorry but never mean it. Therefore, it is important to understand if the person is saying sorry because he/she wants forgiveness from you or just to get his/her work done. Many would fall in the latter category who use ‘sorry‘ as a tool to manipulate and get their job done. With experience, I am now able to identify these people and honestly, I have stopped ‘forgiving’ them and that has actually made my life far better. However, that does not mean I keep nurturing grudges against them. I never let any negative feelings and always chant for these people to get a better sense.

Previously, I had a wrong notion of forgiveness and considered it as getting back to where it started, thus repeating the same pattern of wrong-doing again. Forgiving others and not holding on to grudges is good but after spending four decades in this world, my life lesson is that at times it is also good to move on. Well, forgive for the peace of your mind but also move on and do not allow that person back in your life, that eventually makes life stress-free.

When you forgive, you do not gloss over or deny the seriousness of an offense against you. Forgiveness does not mean forgetting, nor does it mean condoning or excusing offenses. Though forgiveness can help repair a damaged relationship, it doesn’t obligate you to reconcile with the person who harmed you. Forgiveness brings the forgiver peace of mind and frees us from corrosive anger. Therefore forgive but do not repeat the same pattern and move on from the toxic situation or person. Never let forgiving others become your weak point rather turn it into your strength to let go of negativity.

 

‘I’m Writing Bravely for the Write Tribe Festival of Words – March 2019’

Prompt: Forgive

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10 thoughts on “Forgive- #writebravely #celebratewritetribe

  1. Damyanti Biswas says:

    Forgiving others and not holding on to grudges is good but after spending four decades in this world, my life lesson is that at times it is also good to move on. Well, forgive for the peace of your mind but also move on.

    True. Sometimes, moving on is the only option.

    Like

  2. neelstoria says:

    Forgive and move on – I practice too and I am glad that it happens quite naturally to me. I believe I am quite liberal and don’t react easily but once it happens am done, I just can never be the same again. The negative feeling doesn’t go away immediately especially if the person concerned is someone close. But over time it does and I reach a stage where I can connect once again but this time differently.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Esha M Dutta says:

    I totally agree, Tina. It takes a long time for people to realise this truth though. I can tell you how many years of struggle it took for me to realise that forgiving and letting go was not losing out and that it would actually set me free. When I actually did forgive and let go, it happened quite naturally. I guess all that negativity within us saps away our positive energy too, so best is to move on. So happy to see you join the FoW this year! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Suzy says:

    Forgiveness doesn’t necessarily mean it’s all back on even keel. My view is that forgiveness means that the action or event no longer affects us. But the ability to forgive easily is a pretty good quality.

    Like

    • Balaka says:

      For me forgiving is easy but moving on is not, I often find myself thinking about them and that is what makes it difficult. But gradually, I am learning. Thanks for reading dear.

      Liked by 1 person

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